Did I mention I Like to Drink?

I figure we all do it. I did just the other night. This is what came of it... Yes, I believe it's a story.

A Beer for Sister Sara

I sat there, on the crooked couch in the living room of the house I didn’t own. I was renting a room at the time, and god how I wanted to leave that filthy place. There was nowhere else to go, nowhere else to be. I’d just gotten off the phone with a close friend I’d met in college years back. He was hunting for jobs, something to call work for the next however many years to come. 

And I was tired. I took a drink of my beer. It was cold, almost too cold - if that's even possible. But it was sweet and it made my mind at ease. I took another drink. Drink after drink, there I sat. My eyes and thoughts were fixated on the glowing screen of my television. It was the same small television I’d had in my dorm room at college—where I met my unemployed friend. I liked the television. I liked my dorm room. I began to miss my dorm room, the place where I could drink cold beer and watch my television without sharing a damn thing with anyone.

I drank another long sip of my cold, sweet beer and reverted my attention to the program on my television. It was a movie, a western movie. I started listening to the dialogue. I took another drink. I realized what was taking place on the screen in front of crooked couch on which i sat. I watched a cowboy who had fallen for a nun he’d just saved from a raping. I liked the dialogue. I liked the cowboy. He wanted to fuck the nun. I think his name was Clint. 

I took two big drinks. I wanted to fuck the nun. I wanted to fuck the actress who played the nun. I don’t know what her name was. 

I took another drink. And another. Then another. I thought of how painful it would be to have an arrow in my shoulder. I drank to that thought. Shortly after, I woke up the next morning on the couch. The cowboy was gone. The nun was gone (I later found out she wasn’t a nun at all and that her name was Shirley). The arrow wound was gone. My beer was piss warm. My back was killing me…

I am Paul Tefft. And I'm a real handful.